I’m feeling those jitters in my stomach because it’s time to make a bold move career-wise- I’ve reached the peak of what I can learn, the challenge is gone, you know when it’s time to start looking and it is PAST time. It’s particularly bittersweet leaving my job because it was my first career move after being home for 11 years with my kids. I went back to the workforce for 2 reasons: 1) I was ready to throw myself back in the world of adults again and 2) I was getting divorced.
My luck in what I found was written in the stars- I was given the opportunity to manage the front office in the elementary school that all of my kids attended. Could it get any better? Even though I lost my kids 50 percent of the time, I would still be there to brush their hair and do braids when they got dropped off by their dad, provide anything they might have forgotten- when you suffer from divorce guilt, these things go a LONG way for a LONG time. I also have an amazing boss that allowed them to hang out in our staff lounge before and after school for years to make it work for me, my commute is a ¼ mile and my health benefits cover me and my kids for FREE!
Despite all the pros, there is one BIG con. I’m capable of so much more- and my heart won’t let me forget it. When your pros list starts to lose its luster and you start to dream of the next chapter, you have to listen. But god is it scary… when you’re so comfortable that you could do your job with your eyes closed and your hands tied behind your back, the low level of stress that affords me should be applauded, right? I wish it could be enough- I love being within a block of all of my kids schools in case there’s an emergency- to catch every sporting event even when they start at ridiculously early times for working parents. I never miss anything. But it’s time to be the mom that doesn’t make every single event- it’s going to sting for a while- but I want my kids to see me thriving at something that brings me joy.
So here I go, back to the land of Indeed.com and LinkedIn- it’s daunting at 48- you start to wonder if people will only go with younger- and that’s the first time I’ve started a job search feeling that way. But there’s one thing I have that a 24 year old does not-besides stretch marks from 3 kids- I know who I am and what I’m capable of- I don’t doubt myself or what I can accomplish if given the chance so throw out some good karma that my dream job decides that the wise choice is to go with the aged fine wine!